7 myths of a break up

It seems that most of us think the same thing when we experience a break up. That it's the end of our life, we will never be happy again and how could this person do this or that to us - or, some variation of these thoughts. Often, we become so caught up in this process that we forget to look at the bigger picture. 

Here then are my 7 myths of a break up. 

1. It’s the end of your life

So, you have been together for a couple of months – maybe even years. All of the sudden, despite spending half your life annoyed at this person, you can no longer live without them.

Do you remember you existed before this relationship? You some-how managed 15, 20 or 25 years without this person holding your hand and calling you beautiful or handsome.

Naturally, it is the end of your life as you know it, you are after all closing a cycle. Tomorrow, however, is a new day with new opportunities. 

2. You will never find anyone else like them

They will also never find anyone else like you. Guess what, you will also never find anyone like Bob, Joe or Simon either. We are all beautifully unique individuals. How amazing is that?! In a world with over 6 billion people and YOU are unique.

Why would you want someone like them anyway? You tried it once, twice or even three times… It didn’t work. Why go down that road again?

3. No one else will love you the same way

Every relationship is unique and special. Your ex saw something wonderful in you and another person you welcome into your life, I’m sure will appreciate something else brilliant about you.

Sometimes we get so caught up in expecting others to love us, that we forget our own relationships with ourselves. Do you love yourself? How can we expect anyone to love us if even we can’t look in the mirror and appreciate who we are? 

4. You will be single forever

Sure, if that’s what you want. You can’t wear new shoes if you don’t take your old ones off. How can you want change in your life, if you don’t open the doors wide for it.

5. Your ex has to be single forever otherwise they never cared for you

Really?

So, you guys broke up and your ex starts another relationship. Would you really rather they were at home suffering? No. After all, you loved them and surely you want them to be happy? How amazing is that this individual has an opportunity to be happy.

You might not be the one giving this individual happiness anymore, but are we so egocentric that we can be the only one to make others happy?

6. But you still love them…

You do? Tell me more about this love.

Is it pure? Is it true?

Then let them be happy and free. Love afterall is generous and kind.   

What a blessing it is that you have the ability to love! 

7. You feel guilty for hurting their feelings since you're the one who broke it off

If it was the other way round, you would rather they were in a relationship with you spending half of the time wishing they could break up?

You promised each other honesty and that's all you are doing. At the end of the day, we can only be responsible for the way we feel and take things. The more you hold yourself responsible for others, the more you will suffer. 

(Please note, I'm in no shape or form suggesting or implying that a break up is an easy process. Every case is different. These points are a mere generalisation)